"If our complaints lead us to leave, we might leave with a sense of failure, of not having done very much at all.

But think of this: an impact can be in what follows, who follows."

- Sara Ahmed

good

important

intelligent

stupid

bad

beautiful

frivolous

ugly

a craft

a piece of design

Why complain?

Where does complaining leave space for positive reflection and celebration for what is going well and the positive changes that have been made?

?

“And so: the costs of not complaining can be the same costs as the costs of having to put up with what makes it difficult to do your work. (…) A complaint is a way of not being crushed.

Complaints do not just lead you into the secret chambers of the institution, as I described earlier; they can also lead you to form new partnerships; they can lead you to work more collectively, to work with the union and with other colleagues to address a problem that is shared.”

- Sara Ahmed

I love the thought that a complaint, whether it is coming through or not, can create a community. I always felt that complaining was some sort of anti-social thing to do. That if you complain, you are more likely to push people away and to isolate yourself. No-one likes a complainer. Mostly because it is not a fun thing to do, it creates conflict. Also a ‘complainer’ is often talked about as someone who is naggy, someone who is always overreacting and never satisfied. Someone who kills the atmosphere. Although I think this can be true in some cases, Sara showed me that a complaint that is there to fight some kind of injustice can also bring people together.

Complaining can be a very social thing to do. You can complain to protect someone from the harm that has been done to you. You can complain to give both you and others a voice. You can complain to give someone else more credibility. You can complain to make someone else feel heard. And sometimes complaining can even lead to the person who is being complained about to have some proper self-reflecting, thus helping them at times too.

Before reading this article I have always tried not to be a ‘complainer’. I saw the people who were often being described as complainers being pushed off and, ironically, complained about. I decided that that was not going to be me. No, I was a fun person, I had a lot of friends who enjoyed spending time with me and mostly, I had a desperate need for people to like met at all times. So i dedicated myself to being ‘low maintenance’, easy going, a joy to be around. I went to fight my ethical fights peacefully and mostly friendly.

Recently I’ve been learning that peaceful and friendly isn’t always effective. So I sort of came to terms with the idea of being a killjoy at times. That I had to be anti-social to be able to be social. But I see now, that I have to be social to be social. And sometimes it takes to be a complainer, to be social.

This is a post from a Dutch Instagram page where they display sayings often told to people with a migration background.

It says ‘So you also can’t drink water?’, referring to a very common question asked during Ramadan. I’m not sure if I would categorize this as an art or design project, but in the event of complaining and social injustice this page sparks a lot of discussion in me. I both love and hate this page.

veelgehoord